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Let's All Discover
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August 2008
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MostePotentePotions [userpic]
I Discovered You: 7, 18, 10

Hello again! Three more prompts for your enjoyment! Please remember that this is AU after about season 2. Also, there's some... creative liberties taken with the timeline.

Title: I've Lost You
Pairing: Cox/JD, mentioned Jordan/Cox
Rating: PG
Prompt: 7. Find Higher Ground
Word Count: 675
Summary: Jordan wants Perry back.

“Well, it seems your wish came true after all, DJ,” A familiar voice sneers from the doorway. J.D. feels all the hairs stand up on the back of his neck as Perry stiffens beneath him. “You should really change your locks, Perry.”

 

“Jordan,” Perry grunts, pushing J.D. off his lap. “Wha---” Perry halts mid-sentence as he stares at the same thing that caught J.D.’s eye. “What the hell are you spawning in there?”

 

“It’s a baby, jackass,” Jordan scowls. “I’ve decided to take you back.”

 

“In case you hadn’t noticed, I don’t want you back,” Perry scoffed.

 

“I think that we both know that DJ here isn’t enough of a woman for you.” She purses her lips, sending a particularly vicious look at him. “Speaking of, DJ, why don’t you just go somewhere and do whatever it is you do when you’re not inspecting my ex-husband’s tonsils? It’s time for the adults to talk.”

 

J.D. tries to glare back at her, but knows it’s ineffective.

 

“I’m going to go make a sandwich,” He mutters, heading into the small kitchen.

 

Jordan always has the worst timing. It’s as if she just waits until just the moment when you think things couldn’t get any better, then she comes in and destroys everything… She’s like the Godzilla of dream killers…  

 

Jordan’s a hundred feet tall, stomping through the streets of Tokyo, crushing buildings indiscriminately. She spews fire at the helicopters circling over head, shaking Perry in her fist. Around him J.D. can feel the crowd fleeing for their lives, but he’s paralyzed as he watches Jordan’s massive stiletto comes down on him…

 

J.D. tries not to be concerned, but it doesn’t quite work. Carla warned him about this… warned him of Jordan’s weird power over Perry. This wasn’t the first time they’d broken up, it wasn’t even the twentieth time.

 

Undoubtedly the baby would only amplify her powers. It was the one thing J.D. couldn’t give Perry... That was assuming the baby was his. Still, Perry was good with the kids that came into the ICU, so it might not matter to him. It was the chance to have a “normal” family with a woman that drove him crazy, literally sometimes.

 

I’m not going to go down without a fight

 

***///***

 

He’d tried discreetly flirting with Perry all day: posing at the nurse’s station in a variety of ways to best highlight his assets, bringing him his coffee just the way he liked it, seductively licking his soup spoon. Jordan would be right behind him though, doing it bigger and better, bringing Perry Starbucks instead of lounge coffee, devouring a huge cheeseburger in five bites Her mouth is HUGE….

 

Desperate now, he relied on the standard pen drop. He made a huge show of bending over to retrieve his pen, making sure to shake his ass a couple times for emphasis. After he stood up and tucked his pen in Perry’s lab jacket Jordan “dropped” her water bottle.

 

Honestly, J.D. rolled his eyes, can’t she think of something original?

 

Then Jordan ran off to the bathrooms, and when Perry followed, J.D. knew it was over.

 

***///***

 

“I’m sorry, Jordan. Jordan!” Perry sighs as he watches Jordan dash out of the restroom and toward the exit.

 

He cared for her, even after the hell they put each other through, but it just wasn’t the same as it was with J.D. With J.D. he wasn’t wondering when the next trick was going come. He promised her that he’d be there for her if she needed help since Daddy was probably going to be a no-show, but that only seemed to upset her more…

 

Sighing, he dialed his ex-mother-in-law and told her to check in on her harpy chick. I can count on one hand how many times I’ve seen Jordan cry… must be hormones. He hangs up as quickly as possible to prevent his eardrums from shattering.

 

Pulling his pager off the waistband of his scrubs, he quickly pages J.D. to ask if he wants Mexican or Chinese tonight.



Title: I'm So Embarassed
Pairing: Cox/JD
Rating: G (seriously!)
Prompt: 18. Break Out
Word Count: 711
Summary: Perry is plagued by a familiar problem. J.D. offers a solution.

Perry yawned, turning on the faucet and leaning over the sink to splash some cool water on his face. He grimaced when he felt the lumps under his skin.

 

Great… just what I needed. You’d think at thirty-eight that this wouldn’t be a problem anymore; obviously spending so much time with Marietta has given me a second adolescence.

 

He scowled at the red spots that were splattered across his face. Opening the medicine chest he pulled out his bottle of hydrogen peroxide and box of Q-tips, and a few minutes of digging around in the drawers revealed a bobby pin that Jordan had left behind.

 

He’d just started to press down on the first pimple, when a girly shriek nearly knocked him on his ass. He turned around to glare at J.D. who was staring at him as if he’d just killed his kitten.

 

“What are you doing!?!!” J.D. scolded, stomping into the bathroom and ripping the bobby pin out of his hand. It would have been much more effective if he were wearing more than his boxers. “That’s terrible for your skin! You’ll make it worse.”

 

Perry rolled his eyes, there was no dealing with J.D. when he was in a snit.

 

“I thought you were a real doctor, not a dermatologist, Kirsten?”

 

“Well, some of us take pride in their appearance…”

 

“Yeah, drop the act. Sleeping with me pretty much blows the whole ‘straight’ thing right out of the water,” Perry said with a roll of his eyes. “If I’m not supposed to poke them, how do you make them go away?”

 

“Where’s your benzoyl peroxide?” Perry raised an eyebrow and J.D. sighed. “What do you use to wash your face?” At Perry’s gesture to the hand soap, J.D. let out a horrified squeak.

 

“You can’t use hand soap on your face!”

 

“I am not using any of that girly crap you slather on ---”

 

“Well your system obviously isn’t working. And I’ll have you know that it says ‘FOR MEN’ right on the bottle---”

 

“Maybe if I stopped sleeping with a teenage girl, I wouldn’t be having this problem.”

 

J.D. let out a frustrated groan and grabbed his wrist, trying to yank him toward the toilet. “Sit down.”

 

Seeing as he probably wasn’t going to get out of whatever J.D. had planned without get nagged for the next week, he gave in and sat down. J.D.’s skin was remarkably clear…

Anyway, he hadn’t had his morning coffee yet, which completely excused his lack of resistance.

 

J.D. dug around in his three-quarters of the medicine cabinet before extracting a small tube. He bit his tongue and let J.D. smear some of the clear gel on his face. It stung a little, and the crusty feeling it left behind was unpleasant, but he assumed J.D. knew what he was doing.

 

“Okay, that should be a start on it. I’ll pick up some products for you this afternoon, and we’ll fix this tonight,”  J.D. clucked, putting the tube carefully back with all the other seemingly identical bottles. “Now don’t pick at them.”

 

“Yes, mother…” Perry muttered, pushing past J.D. to head to the kitchen.

 

Working at the hospital was hell… He lo—liked Carla, but he was pretty close to choking her after she asked how much he was masturbating, to get so many pimples. Of course she had to say it in front of her crony Laverne, who the proceeded to glare and mention something about Jesus that he tuned out.

 

By the time he made it home, he was fed up. He could swear the interns were taking him a little less seriously when he yelled at them with these throbbing pimples on his face. Kelso congratulated him on finally hitting puberty and started in on what was probably a very disturbing story before he fled into a patient’s room.

                                                                                           

He grasped the door handle, only to jerk his hand away when he noticed that it was warm. Frowning, he opened the door, and was blasted by a wave of moist heat.

 

“There you are…” J.D. purred, strolling up in a bathrobe and pecking him on the cheek.

 

“What the hell’s going on, Harriet?”

 

“You know, stress causes a majority of acne flare-ups,” J.D. husks before pulling him into the bedroom.


Title: I Knew It!
Pairing: Cox/JD
Rating: Again with the G
Prompt: 10. Buy Into A Good Story
Word Count: 954
Summary: J.D. finds out one of Perry's secret obsessions.


“What the---” J.D. raises an eyebrow as he pulls out a stack of six books from underneath the bed. The Harry Potter series... They aren’t his, because the first four are paperbacks, and he only buys the hardcover editions.

 

They have to be Perry’s: he’s the only other one living here (obviously), and it’s his side of the bed. Finally! Something we have in common besides medicine

 

“I didn’t know you read Harry Potter,” J.D. smirks as he enters the living room, holding up one of the books as evidence.

 

“I don’t know what you’re talking about, Eileen,” Perry grunts, his eyes never leaving the baseball game playing on the television.

 

“Well, this isn’t my book, so it has to be yours,” J.D. says triumphantly, standing in front of the television. He has Perry cornered on this one…

 

“Move, before I am forced to hurt you,” Perry growls, eyes narrowing. “And it’s Jack’s anyway.”

 

J.D. flops down beside Perry with a sigh. “You know, it’s perfectly okay to like Harry Potter. Lots of guys do…”

 

“You including yourself in that group there, Janice?” Perry scoffs, his eyes still glued to the television. J.D. finds himself pouting, which is less effective than it normally is because Perry isn’t looking at him.

 

“Anyway, Jack can’t read.”

 

“I know, Jordan wanted me to read them to him before bed…”

 

“These books are way too mature for him! Is she trying to scar him!?!” Perry gives him a side glance that clearly states: Ah DUH.

 

“Don’t get your knickers in a twist, Patsy. I didn’t read them to him.”

 

“You expect me to believe those are Jack’s books,” J.D. asks suspiciously, he just can’t quite believe it.

 

“Yes! Now either shut up or go somewhere else, I’m missing the game.”

 

J.D. lets it drop for now, but he knows there’s more going on. He tries to subtly insert Harry Potter into their conversations, deliberately misquoting to see if he can catch him out. But for the first time since J.D. can remember, Perry doesn’t correct him. By the end of the week he almost believes that Perry was telling the truth all along…

 

Unfortunately, he pulls graveyard duty the night the final book comes out. He tries desperately to switch off with anybody, but no luck. The Janitor’s been following him around for the last two days, threatening to read the ending to him off the pirate copy he downloaded off the internet. So far he’s been lucky and managed to shut the door before the Janitor can say anything… but it’s only a matter of time.

 

“So, you’re going to pick up the book for me tonight, aren’t you,” J.D. asks as he laces up his shoes.

 

“No,” Perry replies, not bothering to look away from the game of women’s volleyball.

 

“You promised me!”

 

“Why would I do that, Katy? Go get it yourself.”

 

“That’s fine, I guess. I really didn’t like going down on you anyway…”

 

Perry’s head whips around so fast, J.D.’s surprised he doesn’t have whiplash.

 

“Oh, now that is just cruel, Catherine.”

 

“Are you going to get it for me, or not?”

 

Perry glares at him for several long moments, and J.D.’s almost afraid that he’ll refuse. I like the way he tastes… Then he lets out a loud groan and turns back around to the television.

 

“Fine, I’ll get the goddamn book. You owe me,” Perry says with a manly sulk that J.D. wishes he could pull off.

 

Inwardly cheering, J.D. comes over a kisses Perry on top of the head. “Thank you,”

 

“Whatever.”

 

He almost out the door before he decides to remind Perry one more time. “It comes out at midnight… you’re probably gonna want to get there around 10:30 before the line gets long…”

 

“Yeah, yeah… go,” Perry grunts.

 

It’s 5:16 AM when the janitor finally corners him in a supply closet (does the man ever sleep?) and tells him what happens. The small breakdown he has afterwards convinces the other doctors on that night to send him home early since things have been pretty quiet.

 

On the ride back home he manages to convince himself that the Janitor has lied, or that the version is wrong Scholastic released the books early with the wrong ending so they can catch the bastards who would do such a thing…

 

He frowns when he realizes that the door to the apartment is unlocked, Perry always locks it before he goes to bed… Perry must have woken up early and got the newspaper… only it’s still lying on the mat. Which means he didn’t sleep… and J.D. knew why.

 

“AH HAH!” J.D. cries as he burst through the door. Perry is so startled by his sudden entrance that he falls off the couch, clutching a familiar orange book to his chest. “I knew you liked Harry Potter! I knew it, I knew it, I knew it!”

 

“No, I don’t!” Really, it’s kind of sad how he’s denying it now.

 

“You liar!” J.D. narrows his eyes, and stands over Perry, whose thumb is stuck in the middle of the book, holding his page.

 

“Admit you like Harry Potter, or I’ll tell you how it ends.” The way Perry blanches tells J.D. everything he needs to know.

 

“Fine, I like Harry Potter, are you happy now,” Perry grumbles, pulling himself back onto the couch and reopening the book.

 

J.D. smiles, and sits beside him. “So who’s your favorite character? I like Harry, he’s awesome… Dumbledore’s pretty cool too, I was really sad when he died. Hermione reminds me of Elliot sometimes… So who’s yours?”

 

Perry looks up from the book and cocks an eyebrow. “Snape, of course,”

 

J.D. rolls his eyes, “You would.”